Fireballs

In the town I live in there is a tradition that goes back about 150 years. The last few hours of the year become a spectacle. The "Fireballs" are attached to a handle via a chain. They walk down the high street swinging these blazing balls, with the tradition originally done to fight back evil spirits before the new year.

My wife and daughter wanted to go, I did briefly consider going with them, but it wasn't possible. The cold air heightens my pain and it can cause a blackout, which in this particular case could be really dangerous. So I'm at home hugging a hot water bottle, however my wife is going to try to get a video to put out soon. I can't promise anything as it depends on where they are and if she is able to get footage. I do hope though, that I will have a video to show you all this extraordinary Scottish tradition, posted within the next few hours.

All our best and love

Ross Fraser and Jeni Dern

#newyear

Sensory Space

My sensory space in our living room.

All my best and love

Ross

Christmas present

Christmas and birthdays were tough, scripting meant I felt separated for many years. I also would script what I wanted which was often what was advertised on TV the most. This meant I often didn’t get what I wanted and had no real way of expressing that. I also struggled with family, I wanted to have a deeper relationship and couldn’t get it.

My diagnosis changed that, my friend helped me to express myself in a way I didn’t think was possible. I had to reset some of my parents memories so they could see my view, my experience and different perspective. I found the relationship with my family (mainly my mum and dad) that I had yearned for. My mum actually apologised last year, I told her that it wasn’t necessary. The understanding of autism when I was a child wasn’t there. I pointed out that parents are still looking for the right support and advice. That I know they tried and I wasn’t going to blame them for being given the wrong advice. That’s really what it came down to. I must admit though I did appreciate that my mum recognised that they didn’t understand me. I guess it was important to know that they see me now.

This Christmas was different, it was really relaxed and I got some amazing presents. I actually loved everything I got which I think is a first for me. I think what changed was my family recognised that they don’t need to understand why I am drawn to something. Just know that I understand the reason. My parents got me the Funko anniversary set and a couple of really cool t-shirts. I guess this year felt different because I could just be me. I must admit it felt pretty wonderful.

All our best and love

Ross Fraser and Jeni Dern

Written by – Ross Fraser

#NewLifeAutistic

#mentalhealthadvocate #together #community #actuallyautistic #autismacceptance